Tag Archive | "patience"

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An Argument

Posted on 16 January 2012 by Tea Server

Most arguments are caused by a misunderstanding of the fact that “I am Right”.

Arguments take place between strong relationships, No matter what kind of relationship we have with family, bosses, friends, or life partner.  Arguments and disagreements are a fact of life, arguing is not necessarily a sign of a bad relationship. There are many reasons why arguments occur.
Sometimes they happen because of misunderstandings, sometimes one or both parties are stressed or feeling disrespected, sometimes one person is just plain angry and wants a fight. 
We all argue in our relationships. However you have to handle appropriately then arguments can be healthy. If you ignore them they will just get worse.
That awkward moment when you are arguing with someone for a long time 
and then you realize they are right.

There are different ways of handling arguments graciously here are few:
1: Always argue on solve able issues.  An argument shouldn’t be recurrent, it should be resolved.
2: An argument is not as a quarrel. Stay calm and control your emotions before you begin to express your feelings, 
3: Avoid screaming and threatening tone. Even if the other person raises their voice and you remain calm they will eventually lower their tone as well.
4: If you lose your temper you lose the argument. If you go in for argument, take care of your temper. Your logic (if you have any) will take care of itself.
5: Attacking your opponent or Winning an argument should not be the goal but try to resolve things quickly and successfully is the goal. 
6: Avoid accusations and blaming. Don’t bring past conflicts or old issues into today’s argument whatever those are one year old or one week old, be specific about what’s bothering you at that time and limit your discussion to that one issue.
7: Make your points clearly, clarify any misunderstandings, Always make eye contact, that shows you are not hiding or lying anything.
8: Be honest and a good listener  allow the other person to express their views as well, don’t interrupt your opponent. Take full interest what your opponent say. 

If couples who are in love are called ‘love birds’, then couples who
 always argue should be called ‘angry birds.’ 
9: No matter how much you disagree with your opponent try to view the issue from the other person’s viewpoint then you will understand matter from their perspective.
10: Be open to compromise because sometimes compromise is the only way to letting go many things.
11: Do not repeat your points if you do so then they will lose their importance as no one like to re listen.
12: Keep the argument short. Not to let it escalate into a huge problem or something that hurts the other person. 
13: If you walk out leaving discussion in middle that will make serious situation and will open new thing to debate so avoid it.
14: Never argue when one or both parties is under the influence of alcohol, overly tired or emotional. 
15: Never threaten during argument it will make situation worst.
The aim of an argument should not be to win or lose, indeed it’s about resolving the issue and  to develop an understanding or a compromise between both parties. You have to agree to disagree.  There is nothing wrong with you both living by different rules and having different opinions.

Syndicated from: Stay Blessed

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Importance of Patience

Posted on 04 January 2012 by Tea Server



O you who believe, be steadfast; be supreme in steadfastness… (Surah Al ‘Imran, 200)

Allah has revealed in a verse, “This is a Book We have sent down to you so that you can bring mankind from the darkness to the light, by the permission of their Lord, to the Path of the Almighty, the Praiseworthy” (Surah Ibrahim, 1), thus drawing attention to the Qur’an’s attribute of bringing people from darkness to light.

The Qur’an defines patience as one of the paths that lead people from darkness to light and as an attribute of morality that is superior to, wide-ranging, and very different from the daily behavior of many people. True patience is a moral characteristic displayed in the face of difficulty and in every moment of life. Moreover, it requires the demonstration of determination and consistency during times of ease and hardship, and is a lifelong endeavor that never goes astray, even for a moment.

Allah gives the most striking examples of patience in the lives of the Prophets, because they showed patience while teaching Allah’s religion and leading a moral life. They never deviated from their devotion to Allah, and were patient people who sought only Allah’s approval.

This book will define this high moral virtue taught by the Qur’an and invite people to acquire true patience. Inaccurate understandings of patience will be explained along with the kind of patience Allah requires, how Allah may test people so that they can acquire a more perfect patience, and the great return Allah promises to those who exhibit great patience.

Examples of how the Prophets showed patience in every area until the end of their lives will be presented in the hope that people will “be steadfast for our Lord” until the end of their own lives. (Surat al-Muddaththir, 7)

This book also will give the good news that Allah provided for those who respond to this call with the verse, “give good news to the steadfast” (Surat al-Baqara, 155). Moreover, emphasis will be placed on the facts that Allah is “with the steadfast” (Surat al-Baqara, 153) and that patience is a matchless key that opens doors to many fine things for the faithful. As Prophet Muhammad (saas) states:

Whoever remains patient, Allah will make him patient. Nobody can be given a blessing better and greater than patience. (Bukhari)

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You are Single Not Dead

Posted on 03 January 2012 by Tea Server


Being single does not mean that you are weak, it’s mean you are strong enough to wait for what you really deserve. If you are happy and confident, you are more likely to attract the right person into your life in the first place. And most importantly when Allah (God) knows you’re ready for the responsibility of commitment, He will reveal the right person under the right circumstances. You are not going to displease Allah if you’re single (by Qadar). But you may displease Allah by your lack of thankfulness and weakness in your reliance (tawakul) in Him and giving up on life altogether. Wait patiently and be optimistic.

Some people are single but they are mentally committed to someone. That’s not very healthy for your faith.
It’s all upto Allah. The All-Wise, The Master who knows the secrets of your hearts even if you don’t mention them, The One who knows his weaknesses and your weaknesses and how this combination would destroy your and his life, He wouldn’t let us suffer like that. You need to be patient and have faith that He will provide for you. He will give you better. He will make you happy again. He will do that because He is so Merciful. You need to trust Him. 
Single? Well I don’t even care about my status cause I know Allah is saving me for someone special.
You need to put your faith in the One who created you. Don’t waste your time searching and wishing. One day someone’s gonna walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else! Grow, be patient and be ready, you’ll see Allah will give you a love story far better than you could ever dream of.
Single and upset?
You might be not married to any man, like Maryam [Mary] (Allah Be Pleased With Her) and Allah can make your rank higher than any women on the Earth. Know your priorities. Love and trust is with Allah first.
Yes it is fact that there are many advantages to being in a relationship or marriage, but do not worry or fret if you are still single. Not everything is within our control and sometimes we do have to accept fate. So, why worry unnecessarily over something that we do not have control over? 
Do not let being single thought traped you, make you a slave to the idea of finding someone, deprive you of your ability to enjoy life and cause desperation, depression, and fear. Don’t forget that your life does not end if certain things don’t come your way. Did Allah say anywhere in the Quran and Sunnah that you are worthless if you don’t get married? Being single is not a death sentence, it has own charm you enjoy life in your own way, you get more time to be with yourself, to do a variety of things, indeed you have relationship with freedom. You have lots to do, you have yourself, your friends, your family, and you have Allah. Get out of your mental cage, make your life’s vehicle move on. 

You are still single because it’s all up to Allah (God), our future partners have or have not been already determined 50,000 years ago before this world existed. It’s because of His wisdom that you’re still single. So don’t think you care for yourself more than Allah cares for you! Appreciate His wisdom.
Don’t worry too much, to have a positive attitude and enjoy your single life. Whether you are in a relationship or not, you want to be happy. If you aren’t happy single, then you won’t be happy taken. Happiness comes from within not from anybody else. Research shows that the number one ingredient for happiness, by far, is optimism, so change your approach learn to have more fun be happy and enjoy your life either your are single or not.

Read a related article here–> Single And Upset?

Syndicated from: Stay Blessed

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