By Wajahat Ali for Salon.com

Muslims worldwide groaned upon hearing the news that Oliver Stone’s son, Sean, converted to Islam while filming a documentary in Iran.

Although we — the collective 1.5 billion Muslims worldwide — assume Sean Stone is a fine, upstanding man and sincerely wish him spiritual contentment, we earnestly ask Allah why Islam only attracts controversial celebs (in this case, the son of a controversial celeb) who further tarnish our already toxic brand name?

We plead to the heavens for an answer as to why he converted in Iran, of all places, which is currently the most feared and loathed country in America and about as popular as herpes.

We have patiently endured, oh, Allah.

We miraculously survived Mike Tyson, who converted to Islam while incarcerated, and then angrily threatened Lennox Lewis in an infamous interview: “I want your heart. I will eat his children. Praise be to Allah.”

Awesome.

Islam has the lowest favorability rating of any religion in America. If Islam were a world economy, it would be Greece. If it were a professional athlete, it would be San Francisco 49ers punt returner Kyle Williams, who muffed two critical punts, which helped the New York Giants reach the Super Bowl. If Islam went to the prom, it would be the ugly girl with freckles and an overbite standing in the corner with a bucket of pig’s blood teetering precariously over its head. If Islam were a Republican presidential candidate, it would be Newt Gingrich.

A diverse jirga of American Muslim leaders decided “enough was enough” and held an emergency meeting at Lowes’ Home Improvement store in Dearborn, Mich., to strategize how to bolster Islam’s faltering image.

A consensus emerged that we needed to draft popular, mainstream celebrities whose successful addition to our starting lineup would boost our international brand name. After all, 1,400 years of civilization and the religious practices of 1.5 billion solely rest on the tanned shoulders of the rich, famous and beautiful.

Inspired by comedian Dave Chappelle, one of the few Muslim converts who could be considered a net gain, the Muslims held a “Religious Draft” this week, inviting major religions to participate on hallowed ground: McDonald’s.

The following is a summary of the proceedings.

THE FIRST ROUND PICK

Since it was universally accepted Islam was the 2011 Indianapolis Colts of world religions, they had first pick.

Predictably, the Muslims drafted free agent Liam Neeson, who recently said, “There are 4,000 mosques in [Istanbul]. Some are just stunning and it really makes me think about becoming a Muslim.” The Irish actor is experiencing a pop cultural rebirth as the 21st century embodiment of uncompromising, kick-ass masculinity and sage paternalism. On behalf of Muslims, he took revenge against France, which recently caved into hysteria and banned the burqa. Neeson single-handedly destroyed the entire country with his bare fists in the blockbuster action film “Taken.” Muslims believe Neeson will help rebrand them as Jedi Knights, due to his portrayal of Jedi Qui-Gon in “Star Wars: The Phantom Menace,” and replace their current image as Dark Lords of the Sith.

Rumors circulated that many Evangelical Christians felt slighted by this pick since Muslims stole their digital Avatar of Jesus: Neeson voices “Aslan the Lion” from the “Narnia” movies.

The rest of the day’s picks were organized according to different types of celebrity.

ATHLETES

In a surprise move, the Buddhists requested Mike Tyson from the Muslims. Exhausted from voluntarily suffering for the past 2,500 years, the Buddhists decided Tyson’s crushing right uppercut could “really eff up China.”

In turn, the Buddhists decided to offer the Beastie Boys — the aging, versatile, hip-hop trio from Brooklyn – sensing they peaked with their 1998 “Hello Nasty” album. The Muslims accepted, acknowledging the songs “Sabotage” and “Shake Your Rump” as perennial favorites in Egypt and Lebanon.

The Buddhists selflessly threw in Richard Gere and DVD copies of “American Gigolo” to sweeten the deal.

The Jews intervened and said they wanted the Beastie Boys back on their team. They offered the Muslims Ben Roethlisberger, two-time Super Bowl champion quarterback of the Pittsburgh Steelers. Having read about Big Ben’s dubious history of sexual impropriety, the Muslims passed, but decided to donate Mike D of the Beastie Boys to the Jews as a truce offering. Allegedly, the Muslims could never forgive Mike D for the horribly weak rhyme “Everybody rappin’ like it’s a commercial, acting like life is a big commercial” on the song “Pass the Mic.”

The Jews accepted the offer.

The Muslims, feeling emboldened, made an ambitious pitch to the Christians for Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow, who “just wins.”

Muslims offered former NBA all-star Shaquille O’Neal, who fell from their graces after he acted as a giant genie in the box-office bomb “Kazaam.” They also threw in Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf, the controversial Denver Nuggets star who converted to Islam and refused to stand for “The Star-Spangled Banner” before games. The Christians were initially enticed, seeing this as a perfect “born-again” moment, but they passed.

The Muslims went aggressive and promised they wouldn’t supplant the Constitution with Shariah and replace the White House with minarets unless Tebow and Mel Gibson crossed over.

The Christians, anxious to excommunicate Gibson, agreed. For the 2012 NFL season, Tebowing will now consist of prostrating and praising Allah after every touchdown. The Christians asked the Muslims to preserve Tebow’s chastity and not introduce him to Miss USA Rima Fakih or hot Arab women from the reality TV show “All-American Muslim”; the Muslims said they’d try, but they promised nothing.

COMEDIANS

The Jews made a play for comedian Dave Chappelle, a Muslim, citing his hit series on Comedy Central “Chappelle’s Show” as a creative juggernaut that still influences the masses — especially several rabbis, who apparently love saying, “I’m Rick James, bitch!” after performing circumcisions.

The Muslims immediately rejected the offer, saying Chappelle is perhaps the only living proof that Muslims can be intentionally funny.

Instead, they offered Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad as an example of an unintentional comedian and provocateur in exchange for Israel cooling down its dangerous rhetoric of a preemptive strike on Iran.

Furthermore, the Muslims offered the newly acquired Mel Gibson straight up for Jerry Seinfeld.

The Mormons tried to intercept Seinfeld by playing one of their highest cards: “Napoleon Dynamite” actor Jon Heder. The Jews pretended not to hear this mockery and allowed the Mormons to slink away with some shred of remaining dignity.

The Jews finalized a deal with the Muslims and rumors have circulated since that Mel and Ahmadinejad are under house arrest in Tel Aviv, forced to watch “The Chosen” and “Fiddler on the Roof” on repeat while listening to Jerry Lewis perform comedy.

MUSICIANS

Sensing friendly relations, the Jews humbly approached the Muslims for rapper Ice Cube, citing his immense street cred and respect from the hip-hop and African-American communities. The Jews conceded the Matisyahu experiment, although initially promising, had failed, as the Hasidic reggae rapper never lived up to his “King Without a Crown” potential.

The Muslims mulled it over for a considerable time. The jirga decided they would retain eternal rights to Cube’s 1993 hit single “It Was a Good Day” from his multi-platinum album “Predator,” but ultimately release him because he inexplicably starred in the awful family comedy “Are We There Yet?”

Muslims in return asked the Jews for Kabbalah-worshipping Madonna, sensing serious comeback potential after her excellent Super Bowl halftime show.

Catholics made a request for multi-talented actor and hip-hop artist Mos Def from the Muslims, who soundly rejected any and all future offers, stating the entirety of the Middle East and North Africa could never bear to part with Def’s song “Ms. Fat Booty.”

Instead, Muslims counter-offered with alternative rock artist Everlast, whose 1998 single “What It’s Like” has made a surprising comeback on radio stations due to the economic recession. The Catholics still remember Everlast as the lead singer of the hip-hop band House of Pain, who produced the classic party anthem “Jump Around,” before his conversion to Islam. The Catholics accepted; South Asian Muslims danced to “Jump Around” one last time; and the Muslims in return received Taylor Swift and her legions of pubescent female fans, along with her former boyfriend Taylor Lautner, who played the ethnic werewolf in the “Twilight” movies.

The Muslims had finally secured their most promising young-adult celebrity.

POLITICIANS

The Mormons halfheartedly offered Mitt Romney. The Evangelicals promised Michele Bachmann and her lifetime supply of blinks. The Catholics, out of sheer desperation and embarrassment, bartered Newt Gingrich and his third wife, Callista.

The Muslims decided to stick with their boy, Barack Hussein Obama, in hopes of retaining the White House in 2012.

MISCELLANEOUS

Muslims threw a Hail Mary and asked fundamentalist Christians for Chuck Norris, who so thoroughly kicked the Middle East’s entire ass during the ’80s. The Muslims respected Norris for his ability to fire an Uzi, perform a roundhouse kick and wave an American flag at the same time. In return, Muslims offered the infamous WWF wrestler the Iron Sheikh and even agreed to teach the Christians the impregnable camel clutch. Norris, humbled by the offer, respectfully declined, and admitted that although he enjoyed killing hordes of fictional Arabs in jingoistic action movies like “Delta Force,” he currently fancied himself an intellectual and activist committed to exposing the nonexistent threat of Shariah infiltrating America. The Muslims were saddened, but collectively agreed to watch Norris in the summer action film “Expendables 2.”

The Hindus decided to play their strongest card, actress Julia Roberts, and made a request for journalist Lauren Booth, former British Prime Minister Tony Blair’s sister in law, who converted to Islam in 2010. The Hindus saw her as the perfect revenge and giant, henna-painted middle finger to England for the British Empire’s previous colonization and exploitation of India’s resources. The Muslims thought this was reasonable and now the “Pretty Woman” flashes her million-dollar smile behind a burqa.

THE CHOSEN ONE

Finally, the draft ended with all the religions coveting “the chosen one,” who would single-handedly redeem their public image both at home and abroad.

The Mormons offered former Republican presidential candidate Jon Huntsman, highlighting his excellent Chinese and fine hair. The Muslims initially offered NBA Hall of Famer and current cultural ambassador Kareem Abdul Jabbar. They sweetened the deal and threw in President Obama. The Jews presented Steven Spielberg and his entire film library. The Hindus humbly offered Bollywood actors Amitabh Bachan, Aishwarya Rai and a picture of Gandhi signed by Ben Kingsley. The Buddhists presented Tina Turner, Herbie Hancock and Tiger Woods.

But, it was sadly to no avail.

The Christians and Church of New York decided to keep NBA superstar and New York Knicks point guard Jeremy Lin. Rumors circulated that they were talking to China about a potential trade to ensure the ambitious superpower does not ask the United States to repay its debt, thus financially crippling and utterly destroying our great nation.

All in all, “it was a good day” for the Muslims in the first Religious Draft.

Wajahat Ali is a playwright, attorney, journalist and essayist. His award winning play”The Domestic Crusaders,” was published by McSweeney’s in 2011. He is the lead author of “Fear Inc., Roots of the Islamophobia Network in America.” He is currently writing a pilot for HBO. He is co-editing the anthology “All American: 45 American Men on Being Muslim” published in June 2012. More Wajahat Ali

Filed under: American Muslims, British Muslims, Freedoms, Islam, Muslims, Mysticism, Sufism, United States, US Commission on International Religious Freedom Tagged: All American Muslims, America, American Muslims, Beastie Boys, Bollywood, Buddhists, Celebrity Muslims, Christians, Dave Chappelle, Famous Converts, Famous Muslim Americans, Famous Muslims, France, Islam, Jeremy Lin, Judaism, Judaism And Islam, Kabbalah, Kyle Williams, Liam Neeson, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Matisyahu, Mike Tyson, Mitt Romney, Muslim Americans, Muslim Celebrities, Muslims, Newt Gingrich, Richard Gere, Shaquille O’Neal, Shariah, Star Wars: The Phantom Menace, Taylor Swift, Tim Tebow, Wajahat Ali

T-50 PAK-FA

The Indo-Russian fifth generation fighter aircraft (FGFA) is superior
than the similar Chinese and American rival fighter jets which include
the J 20 Black Eagle and the F-22 Raptor, a top Russian military
commander has claimed.

India and Russia are jointly developing the Sukhoi T-50 PAK FA FGFA for
their respective air forces and have plans of producing over 400 of
these highly-advanced fighter jets.

Commander of the Russian Air Force Colonel General Alexander Zelin told
Russian news agency RIA Novosti that his country's government has
decided to give top priority to the development of the joint venture
aircraft.

"While comparing Russia's T-50 PAK FA with the US F-22 Raptor and
China's Chengdu J-20 Black Eagle, one concludes that the T-50 is
superior to its foreign analogues in terms of its maximum speed in
afterburner and standard modes, maximum range and thrust-to-weight
ratio," he said.

The Russian Air Force Commander said that despite the comparable
dimensions and weight of the Chinese J20 Black Eagle and the F-22
raptor, "the T-50 has much shorter take-off and landing runs. Moreover,
its on-board equipment has better specifications than its foreign
equivalents."

READ MORE

Chinese Z-10  And Z-19 Attack Helicopter

Chinese Z-10  And Z-19 Attack Helicopter

Chinese Z-10  And Z-19 Attack Helicopter

READ MORE

Su-35

Su-35

 China hopes to acquire new Russian S-400 Triumph air defense system by
2015, but only the question of delivery of Su-35 fighters to this
country is being discussed at the moment, Rossiyskaya Gazeta reports.

"The Chinese party has shown interest in acquisition of a number of
Su-35 jets and submitted a proposal to us in 2011. At present this
problem is being elaborated by the designated institution of Russia", –
said the First Deputy Director General of Federal Service of
Military-Technical Cooperation, Alexander Fomin.

Speaking of prospects of air defense systems deliveries to China, Fomin
has reminded that during a period from 1993 to 2010 a large number of
Russian air defense missile systems, including S-300PMU2 “Favorit”, have
been delivered to China.

"As for further cooperation with China in the area of air defense, at
present the Chinese partners are showing interest in acquisition of
next-generation S-400 Triumph air defense systems. They want to acquire
the first batch in 2015", – Fomin said.

READ MORE

By Stephen Magagnini for The Sacremento Bee

KARACHI, Pakistan — On a moonlit Thursday night in February, a television network executive hosted an elegant affair for journalists and diplomats at his villa above the Arabian Sea.

Karachi’s privileged dined on lamb, shrimp, chicken, mutton and fettuccine in mushroom sauce, and were surprised by a quartet of wandering minstrels, soulful Sufi poets who serenade for their supper, uncorking ballads about love.

On the south side of this city of 18 million, a group of Afghan refugees, who scrape out a living collecting cardboard and other recyclables in a slum straddling a swamp of open sewage, were mopping up gravy with roti – Pakistani bread.

About 900 Afghans live in this fetid slum, down the street from poor Pakistanis and water buffalo. They earn about $60 a month and survive on bottled water, chewing tobacco and roti.

“We’re happy in Pakistan,” said 33-year-old Shaezhad, leader of a cardboard collection station. “We get food and respect.”

At the party across town, talk-show hosts and other Pakistani elites blew cigarette smoke into the faces of U.S. journalists, criticizing U.S. foreign policy and the toll the war in Afghanistan has taken on their country.

Many Pakistanis resent American aggression in the region and want more respect from U.S. policymakers, but they don’t hold individual Americans responsible. Yet everywhere we went, we were held to answer for U.S. wars and Americans’ deep misunderstanding of Pakistan.

“You are arrogant, playing video games with our lives,” Abdul Moiz Jaferii, political analyst for CNBC Pakistan, said over lunch one day in Karachi. He was referring to U.S. drone attacks that have killed Pakistani and Afghan civilians.

“And we hate America because the U.S. has always been the biggest, closest ally of the military dictators. You have done nothing to help democracy.”

The impact of the war in Afghanistan has permeated nearly every pore of this country of 180 million. More than 2 million Afghan refugees have fled to Pakistan, and some have brought a culture of violence. Since 9/11, 35,000 Pakistanis have been killed in terrorist attacks by suicide bombers and other war-related violence, according to Pakistan’s intelligence agency. The victims include 6,000 soldiers and 29,000 civilians.

The unpredictable violence and the kidnapping of foreign workers have created a climate of fear in this country. We weren’t allowed to visit villages outside urban areas, where 40 percent of Pakistanis live. Two shotgun-wielding security guards protected our buses in Islamabad, Lahore and Karachi. We entered our hotels through metal detectors and were rarely allowed to interact with average citizens in public places.

Pakistan – strategically located between Afghanistan, India, China and Iran and influenced by Saudi Arabia – remains an enigma to many Americans, who aren’t sure whether it’s friend or foe, democracy or military dictatorship.

Pakistan has provided critical support to NATO troops in the Afghan war – drones are launched from here, NATO supplies are sent through this country, and Pakistani troops have helped recapture terrorist strongholds along the volatile Afghan border.

But distrust of the United States in the wake of deadly drone attacks and the deaths of 24 Pakistani soldiers in a cross-border battle in November is such that rather than calling for more U.S. aid to build needed power plants, schools and hospitals, a growing number of Pakistanis want nothing to do with the United States. The government of Punjab – Pakistan’s most powerful state with about 90 million people – has decided to reject U.S. aid.

The killing of Osama bin Laden by U.S. Navy SEALs in Abbottabad in the heart of this country embarrassed and angered the Pakistan military and made Americans question why bin Laden was allowed to live in essentially a resort town. Some U.S. politicians have called for an end to the $18 billion in financial aid pledged since 9/11.

An Islamic republic?

Some of the world’s largest, most beautiful mosques are here, and to celebrate the Prophet Muhammad’s birthday on Feb. 4, 10,000 people named Muhammad gathered in prayer in Karachi.

We saw few women wearing hijabs, or head coverings, except those at Islamabad’s Faisal Mosque, which can hold 10,000 people for Juma, or Friday prayer.

Professional women drive cars, dress like their counterparts in U.S. cities and run government ministries, clinics and newsrooms. Women, who constitute 52 percent of the population, are increasingly getting advanced degrees. There’s a Pakistani proverb: “Every girl who goes to university gets a husband.”

Despite Islam’s ban on liquor, at a party in Islamabad guests of both sexes repaired to a speakeasy in the basement to drink wine or Johnny Walker Black and smoke cigars.

Though most marriages are still arranged, as many as 20 percent are “love marriages,” said Samina Parvez, director general of the government’s external publicity agency. “The divorce rate is also increasing – it’s about 10 or 15 percent,” Parvez said. “The majority of us are not practicing Muslims.”

Kamoran Sani, sales and marketing director for the Sheraton Hotel in Karachi, declared, “What you’ve heard about the Islamic Republic of Pakistan’s a big farce. There are orgies, voyeurs’ lounges, raves.”

A diverse nation

Pakistan didn’t become a nation until the British sliced India into Muslim and Hindu majority states in 1947. Pakistan – an Urdu acronym for Punjab, Afghania, Kashmir, Sindh province and Baluchistan (“stan” means nation) – varies wildly from region to region.

“There is no such thing as Pakistan,” Jaferii said. “First comes your family, then your clan, third your region, fourth your province – the nation comes a distant fifth.”

Much of rural Pakistan is a feudal society dating back to the 13th century. Mullahs, or religious leaders, still invoke blasphemy laws exacting punishment against those accused of insulting Islam. Last year, the governor of Punjab was killed by his bodyguard for criticizing the law as he sought a pardon for a Christian woman sentenced to death.

But Pakistan has tremendous religious and ethnic diversity. Muslims include Sunnis, Shiites, Ismaelis, Ahmadis and Sufis – each practicing their own brand of Islam. At Lahore University of Management Sciences, I chatted with Muslims, Hindus and Christians who were all friends.

From the Sufi love poems to Pashtun folk songs about social justice, music plays a key role in Pakistani identity.

In the center of Karachi there’s a Catholic church – St. Patrick’s Cathedral, built by the Jesuits in 1931. There’s a Jewish cemetery. Sikhs worship throughout Pakistan. The ancient city of Taxila was occupied by Alexander the Great and reflects Persian, Moghul, Buddhist and Christian traditions.

Pakistan’s future

Sixty percent of Pakistan’s population is under age 30; half is under age 20. Half the kids haven’t been to school, and fifth-grade students are reading at a second-grade level, said Nadeem ul-Haq, deputy chairman of the government’s planning commission.

“We have 2 million kids a year entering the labor force. What are these kids going to do?” ul-Haq said. There is no building boom to provide jobs, and foreign investments have been scared away by terrorism.

“Entrepreneurship is the key thing we need to focus on,” he said. “Overseas Pakistanis have been very entrepreneurial, sending back $13 billion a year to their poorer relatives.”

From 7-Elevens to Silicon Valley firms and venture capital funds, ex-pat Pakistanis are thriving in the United States. The 500,000 Pakistanis in the United States, including 100,000 in California, send $100 million a year to charities in Pakistan, said Ahson Rabbani, CEO of I-Care, which connects donors with 30 nonprofits.

In Northern California, Pakistanis raised more than $100,000 for Pakistani flood relief efforts spearheaded by cricket star Imran Khan, who may lead the country if his party wins the next election. Khan has gained credibility by building a cancer hospital for the poor in honor of his late mother. His party includes a women’s wing that has direct access to him.

Philanthropy is playing a growing role in Pakistan, financing schools in poor villages and slums. The Citizens Foundation is educating 100,000 students.

“I mentored six girls,” said Karachi journalist Samia Saleem. “One was 13 and said she didn’t want to get married – she wants to be a teacher.”

Ali Shah Haider, 17, wants to be a commercial pilot. “I sleep from 2 p.m. until 4:30 p.m., then go to work at the textile factory from 8 p.m. to 5 a.m. to support my family – there are 12 of us. I do my homework between shifts.”

A nation’s dreams

Though life seems cheap in Pakistan, the people are upbeat survivors who often describe life as bo hat acha, which means “great!” in Urdu, their main language.

Last year 1,575 people were killed in Karachi, where 2 million weapons are in circulation, said Francisco Quinones of Arcis International Security. A doctor was killed in Karachi the day before we landed. Violence has been blamed on the Taliban, rival political gangs, Sunni and Shia militants, rogue security forces, and Afghan refugees.

Some refugees have been recruited by the Taliban. Others like Shaezhad, who collects recyclables in the slums of Karachi, are glad to be alive under the green and white crescent flag of this country.

Still, he wants to go home to Afghanistan. “We want our land back, we want to live with respect and we want employment.”

Azhar Abbas, the managing director of Geo TV news who hosted the party in Karachi, said that “democracy is taking hold” in his Pakistan despite the violence many here believe followed the U.S. war on terror.

The business editor of daily newspaper the News, Amir Zia, said the United States can still play a positive role in Pakistan. “If Americans pull out without getting the job done, the Islamic extremists will say it’s a victory and will become much more organized.”

But at the National Defense University, business and technology expert Bilal Munshi called Pakistan “a psychologically scarred nation suffering from a mass form of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).”

If the 4 million young people entering the workforce each year get jobs, “we will be a power … but if they don’t see a future they’re going to pick up the gun, and you’re going to be in real trouble.”

The U.S. can help develop Pakistani schools, Bilal said, “but don’t interfere in our internal affairs – let us do things our way.”

Filed under: Afghanistan, American Muslims, Democracy, England, India, Muslims, Nuclear, Pakistan, Pakistan Army, Pakistan Cricket, Pakistani Taliban, Pakistanis, President Obama, Saudi Arabia, Taliban, Tehrik-i-Taliban, terrorism, US Army, US-Pakistan Relations Tagged: Afghan Refugees, Afghanistan, Alexander the Great, Citizens Foundation, Geo Tv, Imran Khan, Karachi, Moghul, NATO, Overseas Pakistanis, Pakistan, Pakistani Americans, Pakistanis, Pashtun, Persian, Punjab, Sikhs, St. Patrick’s Cathedral, Taliban, Taxila, United States, Urdu, US-Pakistani relations

Transform 2012 Marketing Conference

Although the theme given was What’s Next in Brand Management and Generational Marketing, the topics covered were diverse, ranging from personal branding to running a social media campaign.

 Here are the proceedings of the morning session:

Transform 2012 Marketing Conference

Corporate Image Development in a Changing World

Fahad Qadir – Director Public Affairs and Communications –Pak Afghan – Coca-Cola Export Corporation

•  We are living in a world of changing cultures.
• Tahrir Square was a revolution sparked by Twitter.
• In 2002, Netscape IPO was the biggest in history, today the company is no more.
• Facebook has swept the world with lightning speed, becoming equivalent to the second biggest country in the world.
• ‘It takes 20 years to build a reputation and just five minutes to ruin it.’ – Warren Buffet. 
• Actually it takes longer than 20 years to build your reputation. Some of the most reputable companies have been around for more than 100 years.
• Consumers are not attracted by sleek packaging anymore.
• Corporate image is a major part of what sells a company and its products.
• Corporate image building results in trust.
• Coke has been instrumental in helping out with the relief efforts in Pakistan whenever required and goes all the way to help out instead of just writing a cheque.
• Wendy’s Hamburger was one of the most famous burger joints in US, until 2005 when a woman discovered a human finger in her burger. Wendy’s refused to talk to the media while investigating the incident including checking the fingers of its employees in that joint. The woman sued Wendy for $10 million. It was finally revealed that the woman was a conman who pulled such stunts. The finger belonged to her boyfriend. Wendy’s never really recovered from this PR fiasco.
• Tony Howard, CEO of BP went for a holiday with his son in the middle of the 2006 Gulf of Mexico oil spill controversy, pretending as if nothing had happened. He came back and said to the media ‘… I would like my life back…’. He was sacked.
• Toyota in 2010 recalled 700,000 cars which had an issue with the brakes.
• Facebook ran into privacy issues 2010 which they didn’t address properly.
• Iphone 4 had an antenna issue whereby if you kept your hand at a certain point, the signals were lost. No real action taken.
• You could argue that these issues didn’t impact these two giants. Apple is going great guns with $97 Billion in cash reserves alone.
• The point is to stay prepared for the bad times by resolving all issues right then and there.
• Three pillars of Corporate Image:

1. Corporate Politics
2. Corporate Culture
3. Design of the organization

• The golden triangle : Government – Community – Culture
• Jack Welch changed the entire corporate culture of GE, making it one of the biggest American corporations during his reign. He had to take some decision like firing quite a few people but he got it done.
• Coke Studio is a perfect example of the benefits of positive corporate image.
• Coke Studio has done much to improve Pakistan’s image in the eyes of the world, receiving raving reviews on such prestigious publications as Wall Street Journal.
• It is the fourth largest music entity in the world on Google.
• The website receives most hits outside of Pakistan especially from Europe.
• On social media, it has received thousands of views and reviews.
• Interbrand has ranked Coke as the No.1 brand in the world for nine consecutive years.
• Coke is one of three most reputed companies in Pakistan.
• ‘21^st century CEOs will be judged not only by how they changed their industries, but also how well they led their companies to have positive impacts on the world.’ – Hecto Ruiz – Chairman & CEO AMD

Fahad Qadir – Director Public Affairs and Communications -Coca Cola

Q&A SESSION:

• What was the impact of New Coke fiasco? –Yasmeen Zafar - IBA

A.  Somewhere in 1992 our then CEO decided to leverage the Coke brand and come up with a new formula for Coke. After extensive research New Coke was launched while the classic Coke was phased out. People, especially die-hard fans of Coke rejected the new Coke, thousands of letters were sent to the CEO demanding the return of the Red Coke.

• What was the tangible impact of New Coke or even Coke Studio? –Yasmeen Zafar – IBA

A. Both of these incidents affected the bottom-line. I can’t tell you the figures, but it was double-digit.

• You mentioned Coke has indulged in CSR, with the relief efforts and all. Can you give the specifics of it?     -Zeeshan – Owner private firm

A.  Coke was the first entity, even before the US government to not only pledge but disburse $2 million within 24 hours for the 2005 Earthquake. It then gave $3 Mn for the relief of flood victims. Apart from that, Coke initiates sustainable projects. For example there’s one in Nathiagali that has been going for four years, then Women Empowerment through KAAF Foundation since 2 years. All these projects have been devised to be self-sustaining, that at some time we can hand them over to the people to by run by themselves and help the community on their own.

• What has been the impact of negative sentiments associated with America on Coke being an American brand?

A. Yes, Coca-Cola originated in US and we’ve had our fair share of troubles and pitfalls owing to the negative perception of US in this part of the world, but this was 125 years. Now Coke is an entity owned by millions and not by one country. Warren Buffet has the most shares, but that’s just about it. In Pakistan just like everywhere else it is run by the locals. No ‘Gora’ comes here to run the operations, we do it ourselves.  The entire supply chain operation of Coke employs 5 million people. Coke contributes 1.5% of the total tax revenue of Pakistan.

Personal Branding

Yousuf Bashir Qureshi – YBQ Studios

Yousuf Bashir Qureshi -  YBQ Studios

• I thought I was going to be lecturing a group of students. What I’m faced with now is a room full of intellectuals more educated than me. I’m not an MBA. I didn’t have any mentors in my life. I went to cadet college, then I became a food scientist.
• Before my 21^st birthday, I was the most fight-prone person. I just loved to get into a fight. If anyone wanted to pick a fight with someone, he would put me in front. Nothing frightened me.
• On my 21^st birthday party, a female friend of mine much younger than me told me that I was the most afraid person, that I was afraid of what people think about me. All my ego went down the drain. I got angry and threw her out of my party. Later I begged her for forgiveness.
• Our perception of what is desirable and what is not is completely influenced by the media.
• In the 80s, we were told that Cindy Crawford and Brooke Shields were the most beautiful women on the face of the planet. They were mere teenagers and large-frame women as opposed to today’s supermodel definition.
• Then in the early 90s Kate Moss with her negligent chest and hips and a face full of freckles became the darling of the media. All of a sudden, women wanted to grow freckles.
• Further into the 90s, tanned skin and Brazilian hips came in vogue.
• I as a person have no opinion. I’ve to go along with what the media feeds me.
• When a mother goes looking for his son’s bride, the traits used to track down the perfect match are what the media tells you – fair, slim, pretty, educated. The match is finally found and the nuptials tied. The man is congratulated by his peers on getting the trophy wife. The man himself feels proud of having a trophy wife. And yet he goes and has an affair with the maid. The maid is the complete opposite of his trophy wife, of whom he’s proud of, and yet he still has an affair. Why is that?
• I once interviewed a kidnapper, and asked him why did he indulge in this cruel trade. He said it was his family business. Plus he didn’t kidnap the poor people. He only kidnapped rich people who could afford to pay. Likewise the brain can justify even murder.
• You don’t need the outside world to tell you what is good for you or not. The mind, heart and body are enough to make you succeed in life provided that you listen to it.
• Take smoking for example. When you first smoke, the body coughs telling you it’s bad for you. You do it again and again, and the body finally allows you to do it and eventually kills you for abusing it.
• I opened my studio in a small dilapidated alley. People told me who would come here. I didn’t know anyone in Karachi as I had been in the US for 15 years and before that I spent five years in cadet college. I still tried, relying solely on my self-belief.
• Prejudice is a natural fear of strangers and is alright as long as you don’t nurture it which then turns into racism.
• I reinvented my attire, making generous use of pagri, dhoti, and all sorts of non-conventional clothing.
• Initially, I was faced with stiff opposition. People would not allow me into the hotels, thinking I was a worker or something and I would play along with them.
• Once at Heathrow airport, I was standing in the line in all my fashion glory  when one of the attendants approached me and asked if I needed a translator. I said I do if you don’t understand English. She cracked up laughing and got me through the immigration in no time.
• Once I was stopped at the entrance to Sindh Club because of my dhoti. I told the guard that please allow me, the girl who had just entered was wearing a frock that was higher than my dhoti.

Yousuf Bashir Qureshi – YBQ Studios

Q&A SESSION

•  How do you deal with competition and how do you succeed by being different

1. You have to take calculated risks. Without risks, you will go nowhere. Competition will always be there and you’ve to take it all in in a healthy spirit. I’m actually flattered when someone copies my designs. You just need to have unshakeable belief that your Creator will provide you sustenance and then do your own thing.

Marketing to Youth

Noman Asar – Head of Planning JWT

Noman Asar – Head of Planning JWT

• 180 Million people of Pakistan present an ideal opportunity for any marketer.
• This becomes all the more lucrative when you consider that 63% of these people are below the age of 25.
• There are 39 Million people in the age bracket 15-24 years and they constitute 21% of the total population.
• Only 53% of these youth are literate. Females only 42% literate.
• An overwhelming 82% of the females in this bracket are married while only 31% males are.
• This presents an interesting dynamics for the dating scene since the number of males searching for their soul mate far exceed the available females.
• Just because 63% of the population is youth doesn’t mean that they are one big segment and can be marketed as such.
• In reality, there are numerous sub-segments within it that require a unique marketing strategy tailored to it.
• The following is a rough break-up of the youth composition:

1. SEC A – 8%
2. SEC B – 8%
3. SEC C – 15-20%
4. SEC D,E – Remaining

• A rough break-up of the sub-segments within the youth:

1. Primary – Madressah, Government, Private
2. Secondary – Matric/Inter,  O/A Level
3. Young Executives

• The way to know these youth is to go out, intermingle with them or watch them in their habitat.
• I was once observing a couple of kids from SEC C at a swimming pool when one of the kids said to his friend, ‘Why are you vibrating?’. If I wasn’t there observing them in action, I would never have known that the new word for shiver in this target market is ‘Vibrate’. This shows the extent to which mobile devices have seeped into our psyche.
• The learning can be had via three different methods:

1. Ethnographic Studies
2. Qualitative Research
3. Quantitative Research

• People born between 1987 and 1997 either do not know or have had no affect on their mindset, a number of major events like Lebanon massacre, Zia ul Haq, Fall of Russian Empire, Revolution in China etc.
• This group is more influenced by General Musharraf, Taliban, war on terrorism etc.
• JWT conducted a focus group of the young adults and the following insights were gleaned from that session wrt their traits:
  • Traditional, simple but outgoing.
  • More personal bonding with family.
  • Consider their parents as friends. They are more like their ‘peer-ants’.
  • Independent, however within their tradition and cultural norms.
  • Want to increase the quality of their life and their family.
  • The youth value ‘Me’ time more than the previous generation. While the National average is 2 hours, the youth average is 3 hours.
  • There has been a paradigm shift in the ownership of electronic devices. While at one time it was cassette players and video players, today the dominant device is the cellphone, surpassing even DVD and MP3 players.
  • According to a study, 58% of the youth value Ads whereas just 43% of the entire country.
  • According to a study conducted in August 2011 by Anxiety Index, youth were asked positive or negative reaction about a number of factors including Food and petrol prices. Not a single factor was rated positive by them.
  • The problems of Roti, Kapra aur Makaan that were dominant 30 years ago are still relevant and directly affect the youth.
  • The levels of anxiety amongst the Pakistani youth are one of the highest in the world at 89%, just behind Japan at 90%.
  • What’s even more alarming is the level of pessimism. They feel alienated in their own country. 
  • They were also asked to rate their favorite TVC and from what they told us, we’ve a fairly good idea of what to show in a TVC.
  • You need to create a TVC which is either Escapist, Revolutionary or inspires Hope.
  • The challenge is to come with a campaign which increases your market share in spite of all odds, including the pessimistic state of the state and the target market.
  • Band-Aid is one brand that was able to increase its sales in spite of holding 82% of the market share and having a product that didn’t inspire, and was looked down upon.
  • They did it by hiring the Brazilian designer Alexandre Herchcovitch to come up with innovative designs for the bandage and use it on fashion models during his shows.
  • The result: using band-aids became a fashion statement, with people using band-aids on all sorts of apparels and accessories apart from on their own self.

• Ford used the popular social networking site Bebo to strike a conversation with its target market in New Zealand for its new Fiesta in an interview style campaign. 
• Kit Kat in Japan is called Kittu Katsu, meaning ‘Wish u luck’. Because wishing luck is an important part of Japanese culture, and they still use snail mail to send such cards, Kit Kat created a brand alliance with Japan Post Office whereby people could send Kittu Katsu to their loved ones whose wrapper was shaped in the form of a post-card.
• This strategy created $11 Million worth of free publicity.

• Indian Panga League was a spoof of Indian Premier League created by Virgin Mobile whose purpose was to promote its new call rates during the IPL. The activity went viral on social media.

• Coke Studio’s success was largely due to the digital medium instead of just the TV.

Q. How do you propose marketing to the rural market as social media is still very limited in penetration in a country like Pakistan.

A. TV ads are still very important and one of the most effective ways of reaching the mass market that social media cannot. Having said that, TVC alone cannot achieve your brand goals and it will have to be part of a campaign in which social media plays a big part as well.

End of First Part…….

Transform 2012 Marketing Conference

Related posts:

1. Transform 2012 Conference: What’s Next in Brand Management & Generational Marketing After the  success of Transform 2011 Conference: What’s Next in…

By Chris Brummitt for The Associated Press

Inside a high-security air force complex that builds jet fighters and weapons systems, Pakistan’s military is working on the latest addition to its sprawling commercial empire: a homegrown version of the iPad.

It’s a venture that bundles together Pakistani engineering and Chinese hardware, and shines a light on the military’s controversial foothold in the consumer market. Supporters say it will boost the economy as well as a troubled nation’s self-esteem. It all comes together at an air force base in Kamra in northern Pakistan, where avionics engineers — when they’re not working on defense projects — assemble the PACPAD 1.

“The original is the iPad, the copy is the PACPAD,” said Mohammad Imran, who stocks the product at his small computer and cell phone shop in a mall in Rawalpindi, a city not far from Kamra and the home of the Pakistani army.

The device runs on Android 2.3, an operating system made by Google and given away for free. At around $200, it’s less than half the price of Apple or Samsung devices and cheaper than other low-end Chinese tablets on the market, with the bonus of a local, one-year guarantee.

The PAC in the name stands for the Pakistan Aeronautical Complex, where it is made. The PAC also makes an e-reader and small laptop.
Such endeavors are still at the pilot stage and represent just a sliver of the military’s business portfolio, which encompasses massive land holdings, flour and sugar mills, hotels, travel agents, even a brand of breakfast cereal.

The military is powerful, its businesses are rarely subject to civilian scrutiny, and it has staged three coups since Pakistan became a state in 1947. Many Pakistanis find its economic activities corrupting and say it should focus on entirely on defense.

“I just can’t figure it out,” said Jehan Ara, head of Pakistan’s Software Houses Association, said of the PACPAD. “Even if they could sell a billion units, I can’t see the point. The air force is supposed to be protecting the air space and borders of the country.”

Supporters say the foray into information technology is a boost to national pride for a country vastly overshadowed by archrival India in the high-tech field. Tech websites in the country have shown curiosity or cautious enthusiasm, but say it’s too early to predict how the device will perform. Skeptics claim it’s a vanity project that will never see mass production.

Only a few hundred of each products has been made so far, though a new batch will be completed in the next three months. “The defense industry is trying to justify its presence by doing more than just produce weapons,” said Ayesha Siddiqa, author of Military Inc., a critical study of military businesses. “Some smart aleck must have thought we can make some money here.”

PAC’s website at http://www.cpmc.pk says the goal is “strengthening the national economy through commercialization” and lauds the collaboration with China — something that likely resonates among nationalists.

China is regarded as a firm ally by Pakistan’s security establishment, whereas the U.S., despite pouring billions of dollars in aid into the country, is seen as fickle and increasingly as an enemy.

These perceptions have heightened as the U.S. intensifies drone attacks on militants based in the Pakistani borderlands. But the military is also a target of those militants. In 2007 the base at Kamra, home to 12,000 workers and their families, nine people died when a cyclist blew himself up at the entrance.

PAC officials suggested the program that produces the PACPAD was modeled in part on the Chinese military’s entry into commercial industry, which lasted two decades until it was ordered to cut back lest it become corrupted and lose sight of its core mission.

The tablet and other devices are made in a low-slung facility, daubed in camouflage paint, near, a factory that produces J-17 Thunder fighter jets with Chinese help.

“It’s about using spare capacity. There are 24 hours in a day, do we waste them or use them to make something?” said Sohail Kalim, PAC’s sales director. “The profits go to the welfare of the people here. There are lots of auditors. They don’t let us do any hanky-panky here.”

PAC builds the PACPAD with a company called Innavtek in a Hong Kong-registered partnership that also builds high-tech parts for the warplanes.
But basic questions go unanswered. Maqsood Arshad, a retired air force officer who is one of the directors, couldn’t say how much money had been invested, how many units the venture hoped to sell and what the profit from each sale was likely to be.

The market for low-cost Android tablets is expanding quickly around the world, with factories in China filling most of the demand. Last year, an Indian company produced the “Aakash” tablet, priced at $50, and sold largely to schoolchildren and students.

Arshad said a second-generation PACPAD would be launched in the next three months, able to connect to the Internet via cell phone networks and other improved features. He said the Kamra facility could produce up to 1,000 devices a day.

During a brief test, The tablet with its 7-inch screen appeared to run well and the screen responsiveness was sharp. “It seems good, but operation-wise I have to look into it,” said Mohammad Akmal, who had come to the store in Rawalpindi to check the product out. “Within a month or so, we will know.”

Filed under: China, India, Nuclear, Pakistan, Pakistan Army, Pakistanis, United States Tagged: Apple, China, Chinese, iPad, PAC, PACPAD, Pakistan Aeronautical Complex, Pakistan Air Force, Pakistan Army, Pakistan’s Software Houses Association, Samsung

Inside a high-security air force complex that builds jet fighters and weapons systems, Pakistan’s military is working on the latest addition to its sprawling commercial empire: a homegrown version of the iPad.

It’s a venture that bundles together Pakistani engineering and Chinese hardware, and shines a light on the military’s controversial foothold in the consumer market. Supporters say it will boost the economy as well as a troubled nation’s self-esteem.

It all comes together at an air force base in Kamra in northern Pakistan, where avionics engineers — when they’re not working on defense projects — assemble the PACPAD 1.

“The original is the iPad, the copy is the PACPAD,” said Mohammad Imran, who stocks the product at his small computer and cell phone shop in a mall in Rawalpindi, a city not far from Kamra and the home of the Pakistani army.

The device runs on Android 2.3, an operating system made by Google and given away for free. At around $200, it’s less than half the price of Apple or Samsung devices and cheaper than other low-end Chinese tablets on the market, with the bonus of a local, one-year guarantee.

The PAC in the name stands for the Pakistan Aeronautical Complex, where it is made. The PAC also makes an e-reader and small laptop.

Such endeavors are still at the pilot stage and represent just a sliver of the military’s business portfolio, which encompasses massive land holdings, flour and sugar mills, hotels, travel agents, even a brand of breakfast cereal.

The military is powerful, its businesses are rarely subject to civilian scrutiny, and it has staged three coups since Pakistan became a state in 1947. Many Pakistanis find its economic activities corrupting and say it should focus on entirely on defense.

“I just can’t figure it out,” said Jehan Ara, head of Pakistan’s Software Houses Association, said of the PACPAD. “Even if they could sell a billion units, I can’t see the point. The air force is supposed to be protecting the air space and borders of the country.”

Supporters say the foray into information technology is a boost to national pride for a country vastly overshadowed by archrival India in the high-tech field. Tech websites in the country have shown curiosity or cautious enthusiasm, but say it’s too early to predict how the device will perform. Skeptics claim it’s a vanity project that will never see mass production.

Only a few hundred of each products has been made so far, though a new batch will be completed in the next three months.

“The defense industry is trying to justify its presence by doing more than just produce weapons,” said Ayesha Siddiqa, author of Military Inc., a critical study of military businesses. “Some smart aleck must have thought we can make some money here.”

PAC’s website at http://www.cpmc.pk says the goal is “strengthening the national economy through commercialization” and lauds the collaboration with China — something that likely resonates among nationalists.

China is regarded as a firm ally by Pakistan’s security establishment, whereas the U.S., despite pouring billions of dollars in aid into the country, is seen as fickle and increasingly as an enemy.

These perceptions have heightened as the U.S. intensifies drone attacks on militants based in the Pakistani borderlands. But the military is also a target of those militants. In 2007 the base at Kamra, home to 12,000 workers and their families, nine people died when a cyclist blew himself up at the entrance.

PAC officials suggested the program that produces the PACPAD was modeled in part on the Chinese military’s entry into commercial industry, which lasted two decades until it was ordered to cut back lest it become corrupted and lose sight of its core mission.

The tablet and other devices are made in a low-slung facility, daubed in camouflage paint, near, a factory that produces J-17 Thunder fighter jets with Chinese help.

“It’s about using spare capacity. There are 24 hours in a day, do we waste them or use them to make something?” said Sohail Kalim, PAC’s sales director. “The profits go to the welfare of the people here. There are lots of auditors. They don’t let us do any hanky-panky here.”

PAC builds the PACPAD with a company called Innavtek in a Hong Kong-registered partnership that also builds high-tech parts for the warplanes.

But basic questions go unanswered. Maqsood Arshad, a retired air force officer who is one of the directors, couldn’t say how much money had been invested, how many units the venture hoped to sell and what the profit from each sale was likely to be.

The market for low-cost Android tablets is expanding quickly around the world, with factories in China filling most of the demand. Last year, an Indian company produced the “Aakash” tablet, priced at $50, and sold largely to schoolchildren and students.

Arshad said a second-generation PACPAD would be launched in the next three months, able to connect to the Internet via cell phone networks and other improved features. He said the Kamra facility could produce up to 1,000 devices a day.

During a brief test, The tablet with its 7-inch screen appeared to run well and the screen responsiveness was sharp.

“It seems good, but operation-wise I have to look into it,” said Mohammad Akmal, who had come to the store in Rawalpindi to check the product out. “Within a month or so, we will know.”

While addressing the inaugural ceremony of the Arfa Software Technology Park, 9 Feb 2012, Punjab Chief Minister Shahbaz Sharif said the tallest building of the province had been named after the youngest IT expert Arfa Karim and no other name could be better for the building.

Punjab Chief Minister Shahbaz Sharif has said that Arfa Software Technology Park reflects the Pak-China friendship and it will prove to be the hub of information technology activities.

Arfa Software Technology Park constructed with the cooperation of China.

Punjab government had taken various steps for promotion of information technology. The software technology park would prove to be a milestone in IT promotion and a campus of the Information Technology University of international standard would also be set up there within next few months.

Father of Arfa Karim, Col (r) Amjad Karim Randhawa and head of China State Construction Engineering Corporation Madam Li Hau and Commercial Consular of China also addressed the function.

CM lauded Chairman Planning and Development Javed Aslam, Chairman Information Technology Board Dr Umar Saif, former Chairman Information Technology Board Dr. Javed Ghani, engineers of China State Construction Engineering Corporation and the entire team made for the completion of the Arfa Software Technology Park.

Arfa Software Technology Park Building Lahore

Curtesy: The News

© Pakistan Live News

NTU – North Spine

Had luck not sided with me, I probably would be studying Telecommunications Engineering at the National University of Science and Technology, Pakistan. However, thanks to good fortune, I am now at Nanyang Technological University (NTU), Singapore. I am currently doing my Bachelors in Electrical and Electronic Engineering (EEE).  My decision to join Nanyang Technological University was one which, in hindsight was made in the blink of an eye. It was on August 14, 2007 that I got an offer from NTU and I was in Singapore on September 1. The decision was, practically, made in one day. It is a decision which I am thankful I made, for studying here is an experience that I would not trade for anything.

Nanyang Technological University has twelve schools, covering Engineering, Sciences, Business, Arts, Communication Studies and International Studies. It is a research intensive university ranked among the top 25 in the World Engineering Rankings.

The university offers something which could not have been offered to me in any university back home; a cross-cultural society where I can compete with people from different origins. This fact alone was perhaps my largest motivation to attend NTU initially. Here I have the opportunity to represent Pakistan in a university which was until now devoid of Pakistanis. I joined five other Pakistanis to form the smallest undergraduate International group in NTU. This has also motivated me since to make the most of my experience. It remains my constant endeavour to be a true representative of my country and NTU provides me with an excellent platform to exhibit just who Pakistanis are.

With a strong presence of students from China, who are well-known for their hard work, NTU offers an academic environment which is highly competitive. The School of Electrical and Electronic Engineering is one of the world’s largest Electrical Schools with a student population in excess of three-thousand. The Bachelor degree of Electrical and Electronic Engineering offers students an option of choosing a specialization in the third year with various choices; bioelectronics, digital signal processing, IC design, and clean energy to name a few. I intend to specialize in a field that is not too common in Pakistan- IC Design. By doing so, I intend to bring this industry to Pakistan. These choices of specialization are not available in most Undergraduate Electrical Engineering programmes, so this is one of the many factors which make NTU a very good choice for Electrical and Electronic Engineering. The School of Electrical and Electronic Engineering has a faculty of around two-hundred distinguished professors who have years of experience in teaching and research. Undergraduate students can work with professors on research which is counted towards academic units (credit hours). All students in NTU have to spend one semester in their third year on “industrial attachment,” which provides students with practical training opportunities. One also has a choice of overseas attachment under this programme.

NTU offers a very active extra-curricular environment with a number of societies and sports clubs. The NTU Cricket Team plays in the Singapore Cricket league, which offers cricket lovers a chance to play good, competitive cricket. Cricket in NTU has been my main extra-curricular activity.

Admissions are based on O and A Levels results. Applications are open until March each year. Admission into NTU is conditionally offered, and dependant upon a good A-Level result.

Source: Adnan Ahmad Khan